Why I Left Islam

 By

Ruhi Al-Ahmed 

I didn't become an atheist because I rebelled against Islam. I rebelled against atheism as a practicing Muslim until I couldn't rebel any further.

I was born and raised in the United States to a Sunni-Muslim family. Though my family wasn't so religious themselves, they were very traditional. They, similar to most moderate Muslims the world over, picked and chose which aspects of Islam they wanted to keep and obey and which to eschew. I was always a “cultural Muslim” or a religiously unobservant individual that identified with the Muslim culture due to family background - up until 9/11. This horrific tragedy on American soil had left many families torn apart. Family members were murdered, missing, and impaired. But 9/11 changed the way people looked at me forever. I was nine years old and very confused on whether the terrorism that occurred was Islamic or not – was it done by Muslims or misguided Muslims? Was this all a set up? Perhaps a conspiracy theory? My heart was shattered and I wanted to understand all that was going on but I didn't get proper explanations from my family and people at school thinking I was a terrorist child didn't help either.

As I transitioned from a little girl to a high school student, I began to deeply ponder on my roots and the religion my family followed. I never saw anything “terrorist-like” in my house, a house full of Muslims but the media claimed otherwise. How is it that reports from an American think tank and PBS have estimated 1.2 to 1.57 billion Muslims populate the Earth? Approximately 20% of the world is composed of terrorists? It all overwhelmed my mind and I took it upon myself to do some research on the religion of Islam itself. Interestingly enough, I found that Islam was in fact a very organized and peaceful religion. I learned all about the five pillars, the spirituality, the love for one another within the ummah, or Muslim community, and was absolutely astonished at how beautiful Islam was. I was in fact very infuriated with myself for being so distant from Islam and it's culture for so long. It was something I always had but never appreciated. I felt as if I didn't embrace what I was gifted with, being born in a Muslim family. What a sin... I was misguided and deluded by earthly pleasures that Islam notoriously warns about.

College came into play and I became very radicalized. I covered my hair and body from head to toe, a requirement for Muslim women. I wore the traditional hijab, or headscarf, and was seriously considering wearing the niqab – the head and face covering. I only spoke to Muslims - specifically women since it is a sin for a Muslim woman and man to speak unless it is absolutely necessary. Speaking to non-Muslims would have resulted in me being “dirtied” by non-Islamic thoughts and words. After all, it is told and believed by the Muslim world that Westerners and non-Muslims are completely immoral and are controlled not by God but by Zionism. I spoke shyly and quietly, as a Muslim woman should in a Wahhabi society. My eyes were certain not to meet with any man's eyes for if that were to be done fitna, or temptation, may occur. I was a Muslim and therefore a salve to Allah, the one god. I prayed all five times a day, everyday and felt incomplete if I missed one prayer. 

 

People, particularly Muslims would think that my path from Islam to atheism is solely based on anti-Islamic propaganda in the media set by the evil Zionists. Ironically enough, my atheism stems back to the Koran as well as the Hadith. As I became more and more religious during my college years, I happened to stumble upon certain verses from both the Koran and Hadith that challenged me spiritually and intellectually. Inconsistencies, contradictions, hateful material and the prophet Muhammad's life alone was enough to turn me away from Islam.

Claims of a Flat Earth

And the earth We have spread out (like a carpet); set thereon mountains firm and immovable; and produced therein all kinds of things in due balance. 

Koran 15:19

He Who has, made for you the earth like a carpet spread out; has enabled you to go about therein by roads (and channels); and has sent down water from the sky." With it have We produced diverse pairs of plants each separate from the others. 

Koran 20:53

And Allah has made the earth for you as a carpet (spread out), 

Koran 71:19

Embryology

Verily WE created Man from a drop of mingled sperm, in order to try him: So We gave him (the gifts), of Hearing and Sight.

Koran 76:2

Verily We created man from a product of wet earth; Then placed him as a drop (of seed) in a safe lodging; Then fashioned We the drop a clot, then fashioned We the clot a little lump, then fashioned We the little lump bones, then clothed the bones with flesh, and then produced it as another creation. So blessed be Allah, the Best of creators! 

Koran 23:12-14

We can extract from the verses presented above that the Quranic embryology pseudoscience proponents are:
1.) dust/clay
2.) sperm
3.) a clot
4.) a partly and unpartly formed lump
5.) bones
6.) muscles and flesh He it is Who created you from dust, then from a drop (of seed) then from a clot, then bringeth you forth as a child, then (ordaineth) that ye attain full strength and afterward that ye become old men - though some among you die before - and that ye reach an appointed term, that haply ye may understand
Koran 40:67
As we can see from 40:67, the Koran is incompetent of having the accurate embryology stages which can be found here.

The Big Bang Theory

Muslims claim that the Koran is a book of science but it is nothing but pseudoscience and errors. The Koran is entirely reticent on the big bang theory because it has no understanding of the universe or the origin of Earth. Islam prophesies creationism along with scientific fallacies:

We have built the heaven with might, and We it is Who make the vast extent (thereof).
Koran 51:47

Have not those who disbelieve known that the heavens and the earth were of one piece, then We parted them, and we made every living thing of water? Will they not then believe?
Koran 21:30

And We have set on the earth mountains standing firm, lest it should shake with them, and We have made therein broad highways (between mountains) for them to pass through: that they may receive Guidance.
Koran 21:31

Pedophilia

The Koran and the prophet Mohammad both encourage pedophilia:

Such of your women as have passed the age of monthly courses, for them the prescribed period, if ye have any doubts, is three months, and for those who have no courses (it is the same): for those who carry (life within their wombs), their period is until they deliver their burdens: and for those who fear Allah, He will make their path easy.

Koran 65:4

Giving one’s young children in marriage (is permissible) by virtue of the Statement of Allah: ‘And for those who have courses’ (i.e. they are still immature) (Sura 65:4) And the ‘Iddat [waiting period for a woman before lawful sexual intercourse] for the girl before puberty is three months (in the above Verse).
Bukhari Chapter 39

Narrated Sahl bin Sad: While we were sitting in the company of the Prophet a woman came to him and presented herself (for marriage) to him. The Prophet looked at her, lowering his eyes and raising them, but did not give a reply. One of his companions said, "Marry her to me O Allah's Apostle!" The Prophet asked (him), "Have you got anything?" He said, "I have got nothing." The Prophet said, "Not even an iron ring?" He Sad, "Not even an iron ring, but I will tear my garment into two halves and give her one half and keep the other half." The Prophet; said, "No. Do you know some of the Quran (by heart)?" He said, "Yes." The Prophet said, "Go, I have agreed to marry her to you with what you know of the Qur'an (as her Mahr)." 'And for those who have no courses (i.e. they are still immature). (65.4) And the 'Iddat for the girl before puberty is three months (in the above Verse).

Sahih Bukhari 7:62-63

On Women (Gender Inequality)

Narrated by Abu Said Al-Khudri:

Once Allah's Apostle went out to the Musalla (to offer the prayer) o 'Id-al-Adha or Al-Fitr prayer. Then he passed by the women and said, "O women! Give alms, as I have seen that the majority of the dwellers of Hell-fire were you (women)." They asked, "Why is it so, O Allah's Apostle ?" He replied, "You curse frequently and are ungrateful to your husbands. I have not seen anyone more deficient in intelligence and religion than you. A cautious sensible man could be led astray by some of you." The women asked, "O Allah's Apostle! What is deficient in our intelligence and religion?" He said, "Is not the evidence of two women equal to the witness of one man?" They replied in the affirmative. He said, "This is the deficiency in her intelligence. Isn't it true that a woman can neither pray nor fast during her menses?" The women replied in the affirmative. He said, "This is the deficiency in her religion."

Sahih Bukhari 1:6:301

Narrated by Abu Said Al-Khudri

The Prophet said, "Isn't the witness of a woman equal to half of that of a man?" The women said, "Yes." He said, "This is because of the deficiency of a woman's mind." 

Sahih Bukhari 3:48:826

O ye who believe! When ye deal with each other, in transactions involving future obligations in a fixed period of time, reduce them to writing Let a scribe write down faithfully as between the parties: let not the scribe refuse to write: as Allah Has taught him, so let him write. Let him who incurs the liability dictate, but let him fear His Lord Allah, and not diminish aught of what he owes. If they party liable is mentally deficient, or weak, or unable Himself to dictate, Let his guardian dictate faithfully, and get two witnesses, out of your own men, and if there are not two men, then a man and two women, such as ye choose, for witnesses, so that if one of them errs, the other can remind her. The witnesses should not refuse when they are called on (For evidence). Disdain not to reduce to writing (your contract) for a future period, whether it be small or big: it is juster in the sight of Allah, More suitable as evidence, and more convenient to prevent doubts among yourselves but if it be a transaction which ye carry out on the spot among yourselves, there is no blame on you if ye reduce it not to writing. But take witness whenever ye make a commercial contract; and let neither scribe nor witness suffer harm. If ye do (such harm), it would be wickedness in you. So fear Allah; For it is Good that teaches you. And Allah is well acquainted with all things. If ye are on a journey, and cannot find a scribe, a pledge with possession (may serve the purpose). And if one of you deposits a thing on trust with another, let the trustee (faithfully) discharge his trust, and let him Fear his Lord conceal not evidence; for whoever conceals it, - his heart is tainted with sin. And Allah knoweth all that ye do.

Koran 2:282

Muhammad's Life

Muhammadused assassination to obtain political and religious goals (internal jihad) throughout Arabia and countries that had undergone Islamic expansion.

Pedophilia practiced by Muhammad:Narrated by 'Aisha: I used to play with the dolls in the presence of the Prophet, and my girl friends also used to play with me. When Allah's Apostle used to enter they used to hide themselves, but the Prophet would call them to join and play with me. (The playing with the dolls and similar images is forbidden, but it was allowed for 'Aisha at that time, as she was a little girl, not yet reached the age of puberty.) (Fateh-al-Bari page 143, Vol.13)
Sahih Bukhari 8:73:151

There are endless amounts of verses rife with contradictions and appalling behavior. Surely, many Islamic apologists argue that the act of pedophilia, child brides and the inequality of men and women was the custom and culture of Arabia at that time. If that were so, we can conclude that that the religion of Islam was meant to remain 1400 years back in the Arabian deserts. We see even today in some parts of the Muslim world such as Afghanistan, Pakistan, Egypt, etc. young girls at the ripe age of 8 being married off to men around 50. The practice of polygamy is another misogynistic custom preached and followed by Muslims based from the Koran. Most Muslim countries today recognize polygamy with the exception of Turkey and Tunisia.

Countries in dark blue have polygamous marriages recognized under civil law. Compare this to the map below representing the Ummah, or community of Muslims (Muslim nations).

 

The Koran, Hadith and Siraa (stories of the Prophet Muhammad) provided more than enough information to deviate me from Islam itself. Nowhere in the Koran do we see the peaceful five pillars even mentioned. Islamic spirituality or Sufism that we often see under “Islamic Studies” is barely referenced in the Koran or the Hadith. In fact, many Sunni-Muslims oppose Sufism and their mysticism. 

 

The fact that Islam is broken into 73 different sects is another obstacle that boggled my mind. Only one of these sects is the “true path of Allah.” And even in one sect alone do we see further denominations such as madhab or different schools of thought. This brought forth another crucial question. If one specific sect of Muslims will be granted paradise in the hereafter, what about the rest of the world's population? Isn't the remainder of the world Allah's children as well? Indeed, this is what the Koran states... so then how can Hell embody so many people simply because they followed a different or no religious path at all? Are humble and moral Christians and Jews also doomed? Is that a fair trial? This brought me to the grandest question of them all: If Allah is omnipotent and a truly just and merciful god, how could He simply allow His own creation to suffer in Hellfire when He Himself had the ability of saving them? After all, it is Allah who has predetermined our fates. Islam dictates that one's fate has been written before they were even born by Allah. 

 

Questions upon questions with no substantial answers left me in bewilderment. And that is when I realized that Islam cannot be the correct and legitimate religion of God. The Koran claims that if one error is to be found, then to abandon all of the Koran as the words of God. I have discovered more than one flaw within the Koran. My faith has been tested and I had no choice but to be welcomed to a universe of rationality, secularism, self-respect and humanism that I was once veiled from by Islam.

Ruhi is a student at the Rockefeller College of Public Affairs and Policy at the University at Albany. She has done research for the Project on Violent Conflict. Along with that, she has written for Muslims Debate endeavoring to provide news on the practice of Sharia Law. During her free time, Ruhi has been the Public Relations agent of Amnesty International in Albany, a research assistant for the Pre-Law Assosciation at the University at Albany and a volunteer at the Iraqi Refugee Project.